Don't watch Trump's State of the Union, do these 13 things instead!

Don’t give Trump the ratings he craves!

Tuesday night will continue a Presidential tradition dating back to 1790, The State of the Union address. Mr. Trump is obsessed with numbers, crowd size and attention, so don’t give it to him! Don’t watch! You already know he’ll read off a TelePrompTer and somehow manage not to smack himself in the face, then the talking heads will call his barfed up hairball ‘presidential.’ Instead of giving President Cheeto the ratings he craves, do something, anything else.

1. The ‘Peoples State of the Union’ in NYC with Michael Moore: it happens Monday but videos will be online to watch Tuesday instead of Der Trump. For more information click here.

2. Alyssa Milano’s “State of the Dream” Post a 60 second video of your dream on social media during the address.

3. Create an action plan listing three policy goals to focus on as you pester your Reps in 2018.

4. Research organizations working on your goal issues. How can you help them?

5. Watch Citizen Kane by Orsen Wells, a movie about another rich bully cheater obsessed with tacky shit.

6. Take up scrapbooking.

7. Call your bigoted grandpa/auntie/ high school friend to catch up on “stuff and things.” They’ll be torn because they’ll want to watch Trump, but also you NEVER call, (I wonder why) and they want to tell you about how the Old Neighborhood has gone to shit.

8. Clean the cat box, purrrrrrrr-purrrrrrr-lease?

9. Do a nice nail buffing to create a smooth base for future nail biting.

10. Masturbate.

11. Dye your hair blue to trigger men’s rights dudes.

12. Doxx a Nazi.

13. Make a list of ridiculous bible verses dictating obscure rules and punishments that you can use all year. Quote them to Christians, “Do you beat your wife with a stick smaller than your thumb as God Sayeth sir?”

Comment with your alternatives!

By Being Liberal contributor: Sarah Ficca

Image courtesy of The Economist.