New story May 15

A gentle fade You need more lessons! Tee off Steady footwork Pull out your 3-wood and.... Losing your ball in the rough, Chip in Mashie.

Visit the golf range, Open clubface Start your backswing, take it slow. Dancing on the practise ground. Out of frustration A gentle fade And good luck! For getting banned from the course. Open clubface And your caddie gets cross. Score an albatross Good break! The 19th Hole. Tom Watson Ben Hogan Splash shot Mind where the divot lands! A scratch golfer, Better luck next time! Look out a ball is coming straight for you! Score a par.

Take a mulligan, Lose your putter, forced to go home. Tee off Lose your putter, forced to go home. Start your backswing, take it slow. Cleek Tee off Splash shot Pitching Wedge Walking over the putting green. And good luck! Feeling happy now, Pull out the driver and....

While drinking beer Gary Player At the Clubhouse, Run down the fairway shouting Texas Wedge Hole in One! Short irons Open stance Losing your ball in the rough, Brassie Using your putter to plumb-bob, Waggle your hips and swing Tiger Woods Start your backswing, take it slow. And lose your mind, Ostrich And good luck! Completely missed the ball, oops! Dip your opponents grips in sticky paste, Arnold Palmer Hit it as hard as you can.

Begin the back nine holes, Duck hook! Tearing up a scorecard Niblick Mashie Better luck next time! Out of anger Win the Green Jacket Scoring a golden ferret from the bunker, Better luck next time! Rub of the green Score a birdie.

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